Talking to the Owl

Summer’s gone too soon.  On Friday we were on the beach, kicking the water with bare feet one last time.  The water was still and warm and even the breeze felt like summer.  Every time I walk along the beach, I wonder why I don’t do it more often. 

The trees in the distance were just starting to spot gold and red.  Days are warm, but the nights are cool.  I can smell the dusty oak smell of the woods through the open windows as I lie in bed.  Little Sylvia’s now 4 years old and her sister looks at me with big eyes and smiles.  Time passes its sweetness and loss as I wonder where it all went.

Just today we tagged our tree for Christmas.  I felt a little silly to do something Christmas so soon, but we’ll be busy all October and come November the trees will be all taken.  As it was, only three of perhaps ten lots were open and they only had Douglas Fir.

I can say as I look back, I’m just really happy.  It was nice to have a whole weekend spent with the family - no fencing, no yoga, no drumming class.  It’s funny how easily happiness comes when I just simplify my life by letting stuff happen and stop thinking and wanting this or that experience or thing.

It’s strange for me to on one hand to note that I’m happiest when I just experience life, and then on the other, feel guilty for not having a set of goals.  I guess that is just my mind at work, always afraid of being bored, always afraid that if I just live life, then I’m somehow missing out on some opportunity and I’ll look back in ten years and wonder why I’ve wasted so much of my life.  When I look at the photos and see how happy everyone is, I see how silly that thinking is.  Time with my peeps is never wasted.